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Conscious Mind


As the clock strikes
time hits close to home
I ponder the words you speak
bathe and soak in
emotions that breath
conceptions misconception
the miseducation
of feelings flight
rites
like a flower blossoming in favor of summer reign
I depend on you like the soil of
seasons change
Hoping that you return to replenish
again
lord forgive me for I am weak
give me the strength to find what I seek
my days are long and my will is at sleep
I feel failure for getting lost in achievements
feats
I have big dreams but tired of my same ole speech
when will I allow myself to live free
its the goal that I try to preach
ideals are nothing without the drive to complete
compete
mind over matter
I sharpen skills
where the outer shell is strengthened
and focus is in contention
yet
direction is still lacking
lost like a dream
like clouds storming over
all that nature owns
fields unable to predict
the outcome of natures act
the earth
forever wrapped in the wrath of evolution
life
force proving to be the strongest
element
yet able to be still and calm
it reflects
I search for my lost treasure to bare
serenity
in skills that will allow me to be fruitful and happy
giving my all to the things I love
people
that depend on my surrendering soul have faith
in my turnaround yet
patiently I wait
for the missing principle
that will govern my
exhale
my cries pray out to all whom listen
tithing tear drops as offerings
seeds to be planted in this life or the next
I only wish to provide
for those who know my consuming eyes
cry to sustain the dryness of red eyes and
lost flights
my struggle with growth
begins to unfold
the drama surrounds me as I sit here cold
wondering about the next steps
and what it takes for one to be bold
how do you make your dreams come true
while traveling the road filled with
forks
self doubt and being
poor.


For Moment Sake


Control guilty pleasures of swallowing sin

sweet sincere passions, travel amongst wild winds

serenity caressing sweet fingertips of joy

pain, reveling in the innocence of rampant intuition

wandering amongst fine lines of ambiguous terrain

moments floating in a shroud of mistakes

lost compliments, desirous straits

pure intentions scour the depths with or without meaning

falling for something, only for being

overwhelmed by the power of endless fantasies

exhausted emotions rage against the beloved

attesting ideas and possibilities,

behold awareness of your feelings

involved are we whom stand next to bearable fruits

forbidden or not, human nature craves existence in adventurist shots


My Angels Angel Dust (M.A.A.D.)


M.A.A.D.

what does it get you

better yet where does it take you

words of love, hate-

mind numbing passion that

binds then blinds cellophane wrapped

murmurs of continuous preserved thought

beleaguered tongues random surrender

of roller coasters cascading emotional flights

daydreams and nightmares… realities check mate

life’s up and downs, a teeter totter’s adjacent

parallel rhetorical paradox phase in

Two faces

mold, push, guide, distinguish the vain

inner lines of my reign

hope my lies fail with success

despite the drive overflowing with charred barren fruit

thoughts that create opposing views of life.

forgive me for sins I had no intentions to commit

blessed be the light that forgives the weak and protects the meek

 


Thoughts Memorandom


This is all for show
your-vision…
my-vision
equals, tell a vision
because it all seems like game to me
were we semen cursed
birthed and conditioned
in false idols and lost bibles
Oh!
I see
Im not better than you
but, your so much greater than me
I just wanted you to speak
be free
I struggle with
7
deadly sins daily
I notice not the temptation of
3+3 three times me failing
to fit in
I’m talking about being ok
to be ok with me
I’m talking about the boy
materializing his belongings to satisfy
longings of
her
who still thinks a dick
is the only night stick that makes rape
feel like the most painful pleasures robbing
her of mind body and soul
Im speaking on you
being false
aggravate change
manipulate strings
that will gain you objectified
personal means
lost beneath the light in the great ceiling
they say you are what you eat
you are what you see
you are a piece of the people you meet
we’re part of the tree
the apple that holds knowledge
to see you as you
and me as me
Am i the difference of Adam
and you Eve
because it seems we are faced constantly
with that strange fruit hanging from tree’s
inviting a world of paradise only few have gotten to see
In the end I am thinking about
you being you
me being me
and being satisfied to live free
without the care of knowing what
any one thinks
there is nothing more important than finding yourself
nor painful in denying yourself
you


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